"So.. are you drunk or just stoned?.."

Thats right bitches.. just like Tyra, I know grace these slutty wet streets..

So after a dramatic, almost missed the bus moment, cutting our goodbyes from out loved ones in Jonkoping, we (P, A, and I) spent 17 hours on a bus that crossed through 4 countries, to Amsterdam. I now sit, wet, in the hostel lobby trying to find a bloody powerpoint for my laptop, which i will hopefully pawn off to my parents in London tomorrow night.

The hostel is located in Vondelpark, which as Jasper tells us, is a place where public sex is legal. We've already seen naked cyclists and several drunk, stoned, and out of it in general locals and tourists (a ratio that I'm not sure of). We checked out a smart shop and it seems that mushrooms are still legal in AMS. Jasper wasn't sure, as he fears they have been de-legalized in Rotterdam (his crib). I've really been happy with the locals and shop assistants here. They have a Jasper-esuqe cheekiness and dirty-naiveness to them, like this chick at the Body Shop who was shocked that I didn't live in Holland or speak Dutch.. its the fucking Body Shop with everything in English crazy bitch. The city is really pretty too, Ill upload more pics when i get another chance, but for now theres just the one of me looking sexy. And theres no photos in the Red Light Dis. anyway so.. you probs wont be interested in the rest.

There are urinals on the streets here. Its fucking great. So I took a whizz in one at night. too scared in the day. After an explore of this confusingly delightful and naughty (ooh) city, we met up with Perri's Pals (sounds like a TV show i'd watch) at the hostel. Paige, a mate of Perri's from way back, and her new friend Emma who she met on her exchange in Glasgow this semester. She's from Brisbane and is adding to our posse of 5, which is nice.

With the girls, we head to the Red Light District, via a coffeeshop for a joint and space cakes, to a live sex show. It was pretty spectacular. one couple had worked on an amazing choreographed routine, so good we saw it twice. And now I have finally seen a girl (who looked like little J from Gossip Girl) smoke a cigar with her hoo haa.

Ready to see my folks in London, Ready to smoke the "relax" joint we bought last night in Vondelpark tonight, Ready for my month of nomadness in Europe, baby.

Till then.